I know….it’s not Friday….yep …but so what??? I mean that’s what people do right?? They forget things….and then there are amnesic people who forget a lot of things …..and then there is Sanjay Singhania (Noooo! I am not telling you who Sanjay Singhania is….If you don’t know him don’t waste your time here….go download a Megan fox wallpaper)….So, I forgot my promise to update the blog every Friday….big deal??? (Waise do you really care?).
Actually I had nothing ….nothing at all to serve, till 5:00 this morning…..and then I risked it……I had this pirated DVD of Delhi 6 (to whosoever it may concern …. I didn’t buy it…or rent it….piracy is a crime ……..I know)…..and in the words of….errrrrr….yep…a wise man…. “Risking brings awesome shit, hommie!!”… (There are wise Afro-Americans). So, now I am sitting here scratching my a** and thinking… why exactly did the film not work? ….. I mean …it was the most sensible film I got to watch in recent times …it was metaphorical, symbolic and away from any grandiloquence….so, what was it lacking ?…I thought still scratching. And then “he” caught my eye, ogling at me…from the newspaper….with his TAG HEUER … smiling sarcastically, as if…. Celebrating his victory…. Celebrating his triumph over our senses ……..
Trust me, he knows it….he does…. He knows that his films are crappy….n’ yet we lap them up…. We lick the screen clean off him…… and therefore he smiles…. The fucking knavish of a businessman… the alpha and the omega de bollywood…..THE SHAHRUKH KHAN……
I mean…. I think about his movies and my sense of humour and anger start making out…everytime……..no, seriously, they have it and that too without any latex….
Saw, his latest marvel??? Eh??........Taare zameen Par 2 ….hunh??? ( TZP 2 is also called Rab ne bana di jodi…..in certain parts of the country…..actually in many parts of many countries …I mean it was a hit overseas as well)…. No, trust me that is how I explain the blunder (and trust me, dats the only way)…….’cause that Anushka plays a retard…no, seriously…she puts those….Tulip school children from TZP…..in the Research in humanoids dept. either that…or something even more intelligent ( NASA maybe…)
She, is with the same guy …..with moustaches and without them… I mean the guy does not even care to modulate his voice ( or we could have blamed it on her eyesight. And by the way …I saw the movie with my blind friend and “he”.. could make out that Raj and Sahni …were both played by the same idiot)…….so actually…lemme see…….yes....24x7 /2 + 24x7/2 = fuck you! Aditya Chopra.
And pleez do not get me started on Om Shanti Om…I mean …I can kill Farah Khan...with my bare hands, right now ( and that too without strangling her)..OSO was the worst thing ever (and not only on da celluloid).
But you know what?? The “shopkeeper” is not alone……Remember? Welcome, Singh is King and Chandni Chwok To China…….they’re a conspiracy against our senses…these movies….( and ironically ….the one who fucks our senses the most…..becomes the numero uno in the dicktown)….Akshay Kumar got a Padmashree recently ….Now, can you remember a single movie , he did ….which had n e thing to do with our society or nation or n e thing progressive?? I mean I can’t… (ooops! Now I get it….Chandni Chowk to China…..right!!!……promulgated that n e thing that comes from china…..And costs between Rs.65 and 650000000 is crap....)……
And now something “bout Danny Boyle……..Bafta, Golden globe and an Oscar…….way to go…sadistic bastard……….
For me any body who is an Indian and says that Slum dog millionaire ...deserved… The Oscar….should make a time machine….go to….1908(British dominated India)…. and join the Indian congress ( anil kapoor being the first....but he is not sane enough..not even for congress...). Trust me, there are better films made on Indian slums and grass root underworld by “us” Indians.
The blog is getting real long….and now sounds like a…. “Slanderous” ranting…… but in the words of Samir Agrawal, “truth is acceptable in any form”….. So,lets see….how many of you accept this one………….and seriously…what are you waiting for now??.......go watch Delhi 6….kala Bandar…..theory rocks…
And now a word with our ….commentators:
@ Samir: here is a news flash for you, “suicidal Japanese…kills neighbour by mistake”.
@ preeti: I have a fan!!! ( I prefer a fan….a/c’s are not good for the environment)
@ Divya: now what kind of a sister….would wish…for her brother to not to have any super powers ever???
@ rajat: errr….that you should tell my parents….( m’ 6 feet 1)
@ pankaj: I understand….U were speechless
@ seepika: what is with you and dancing???
@ atul: Teri MAA..... chis……kay liye "thanks".
Actually I had nothing ….nothing at all to serve, till 5:00 this morning…..and then I risked it……I had this pirated DVD of Delhi 6 (to whosoever it may concern …. I didn’t buy it…or rent it….piracy is a crime ……..I know)…..and in the words of….errrrrr….yep…a wise man…. “Risking brings awesome shit, hommie!!”… (There are wise Afro-Americans). So, now I am sitting here scratching my a** and thinking… why exactly did the film not work? ….. I mean …it was the most sensible film I got to watch in recent times …it was metaphorical, symbolic and away from any grandiloquence….so, what was it lacking ?…I thought still scratching. And then “he” caught my eye, ogling at me…from the newspaper….with his TAG HEUER … smiling sarcastically, as if…. Celebrating his victory…. Celebrating his triumph over our senses ……..
Trust me, he knows it….he does…. He knows that his films are crappy….n’ yet we lap them up…. We lick the screen clean off him…… and therefore he smiles…. The fucking knavish of a businessman… the alpha and the omega de bollywood…..THE SHAHRUKH KHAN……
I mean…. I think about his movies and my sense of humour and anger start making out…everytime……..no, seriously, they have it and that too without any latex….
Saw, his latest marvel??? Eh??........Taare zameen Par 2 ….hunh??? ( TZP 2 is also called Rab ne bana di jodi…..in certain parts of the country…..actually in many parts of many countries …I mean it was a hit overseas as well)…. No, trust me that is how I explain the blunder (and trust me, dats the only way)…….’cause that Anushka plays a retard…no, seriously…she puts those….Tulip school children from TZP…..in the Research in humanoids dept. either that…or something even more intelligent ( NASA maybe…)
She, is with the same guy …..with moustaches and without them… I mean the guy does not even care to modulate his voice ( or we could have blamed it on her eyesight. And by the way …I saw the movie with my blind friend and “he”.. could make out that Raj and Sahni …were both played by the same idiot)…….so actually…lemme see…….yes....24x7 /2 + 24x7/2 = fuck you! Aditya Chopra.
And pleez do not get me started on Om Shanti Om…I mean …I can kill Farah Khan...with my bare hands, right now ( and that too without strangling her)..OSO was the worst thing ever (and not only on da celluloid).
But you know what?? The “shopkeeper” is not alone……Remember? Welcome, Singh is King and Chandni Chwok To China…….they’re a conspiracy against our senses…these movies….( and ironically ….the one who fucks our senses the most…..becomes the numero uno in the dicktown)….Akshay Kumar got a Padmashree recently ….Now, can you remember a single movie , he did ….which had n e thing to do with our society or nation or n e thing progressive?? I mean I can’t… (ooops! Now I get it….Chandni Chowk to China…..right!!!……promulgated that n e thing that comes from china…..And costs between Rs.65 and 650000000 is crap....)……
And now something “bout Danny Boyle……..Bafta, Golden globe and an Oscar…….way to go…sadistic bastard……….
For me any body who is an Indian and says that Slum dog millionaire ...deserved… The Oscar….should make a time machine….go to….1908(British dominated India)…. and join the Indian congress ( anil kapoor being the first....but he is not sane enough..not even for congress...). Trust me, there are better films made on Indian slums and grass root underworld by “us” Indians.
The blog is getting real long….and now sounds like a…. “Slanderous” ranting…… but in the words of Samir Agrawal, “truth is acceptable in any form”….. So,lets see….how many of you accept this one………….and seriously…what are you waiting for now??.......go watch Delhi 6….kala Bandar…..theory rocks…
And now a word with our ….commentators:
@ Samir: here is a news flash for you, “suicidal Japanese…kills neighbour by mistake”.
@ preeti: I have a fan!!! ( I prefer a fan….a/c’s are not good for the environment)
@ Divya: now what kind of a sister….would wish…for her brother to not to have any super powers ever???
@ rajat: errr….that you should tell my parents….( m’ 6 feet 1)
@ pankaj: I understand….U were speechless
@ seepika: what is with you and dancing???
@ atul: Teri MAA..... chis……kay liye "thanks".
